soooo...that's all the more reason to stay away from my son...right?!? Although your ex should be respectful to you for the sake of your son, it is not your decision who can and cannot be around him when he is with his father. However, if he puts your child in danger or around a potentially harmful situation or a dangerous person, you can request suspension of parental visits; but to just decide of your own accord that this person your ex decides to be with is not suitable to be around your son is ridiculous.You aren't helping the situation by trying to control the situation.If he left you and your children why would you be surprised that he's still making bad decisions?
anyone i've dated since we split up have not met my son.
they know i have a son, but do not meet him until i think necassary (at this point, no one has). my ex said she's been "thru hell and back" and needs help. K.: You may not like my response, so read on only if you want an honest opinion.
I am both an ex-wife and married to a man who has ex-wives, and I've been in this other woman's shoes, except I am not 16 years younger than my now-husband.
Having been on the other side of this equation ( his ex-wife trying to control with whom her ex can have a relationship and who he can bring around her kids)I find it disturbing that you are assuming he should follow some rule you've decided should be set about dating.
Again, just my perspecive, hope you can see past the age and just try to look at other judging factors.
:) best of luck Hi K., Let me start by saying I support your position of not bringing girlfriends/boyfriends around until it is a serious realtionship. It is difficult, I'm sure, with your ex-husband dating new people and you dating new people. But I would say that it is not up to you to tell your ex-husband who he can date.However, it sounds like the issue of bringing dates around your son is something the two of you should have discussed prior to this woman's entrance into your ex's life. Have you had similar issues with them, or is it the fact that this woman is so young that's really getting to you? How would you feel if he told you how to run your life away from him?The hard truth is that your ex gets to decide who he dates, and both involved in this relationship are adults (regardless of maturity! It's not too late to have a discussion with your ex, just make sure it is not in an accusatory manner, and by all means, do NOT bring up his girlfriend's age! Just because this lady is younger than your husband does not mean she is a bad person.My mother now makes sure she wathches what she says around my kids..still forgets about me. Whatever happens, keep the hatred, anger, and disappointments reguarding your ex away from your son. After all his dad is supposed to be taking care of him, not his girlfriend.Be happy (or act it) when your son tells you stories of his time with his dad..his girlfriend. it's not easy seeing you ex with such a young lady... I hope that you can trust your ex to take good care of your son.(his oldest daughter) We all really didn't care for her for quite some time because of the age thing..addition to him cheating and divorcing my grandma because of this woman. My kids don't notice the age difference and never judged her. They can get attached and if it doesn't work out someone else is gone in their young lives.